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| Julian Assange, seen here claiming that Colonel Sanders was actually never an enlisted member of the U.S. military. |
Wikileaks Founder Julian Assange Set To Release KFC Original Recipe
Film Review: Another Collection
Nick of Time (1995)
Johnny Depp, Christopher Walken
1/5 stars
Kady was running around the apartment doing dishes, hastily trying to clean up before we retired to the couch for the rest of the evening. She finally managed to sit down, just in the nick of time, right as I began the night's film... boy was she upset when she realized we were watching Nick of Time.
Johnny Depp, Christopher Walken
1/5 stars
Kady was running around the apartment doing dishes, hastily trying to clean up before we retired to the couch for the rest of the evening. She finally managed to sit down, just in the nick of time, right as I began the night's film... boy was she upset when she realized we were watching Nick of Time.
Four Dilemmas and a Funeral
For an online literature course I wrote an essay on William Faulkner's short story 'Barn Burning', which I titled 'The Flaming Dilemma: A Sarty Snopes Adventure'. After submitting the essay, which included a particularly clever movie title pun relating to the short story, the teacher sent back the following message:
Reality TV Show Ideas
A lot of people hate reality TV, myself included. But, after interning at a production company for a summer, my perception has changed. I hate it even more.
AIM Talk with Jesse Alkire: Olympics
Ohkeyska (12:39:25 PM): i'm watching curling
Ohkeyska (12:39:28 PM): its lame
jesseyourpalkire (12:39:59 PM): you take that back
jesseyourpalkire (12:40:11 PM): at least it involves a little bit of skill, unlike bobsledding
Ohkeyska (12:39:28 PM): its lame
jesseyourpalkire (12:39:59 PM): you take that back
jesseyourpalkire (12:40:11 PM): at least it involves a little bit of skill, unlike bobsledding
TV Review: Steven Seagal: Lawman
Steven Seagal: Lawman
A&E TV
0/5 Stars
A&E TV
0/5 Stars
If you're like me, when you heard about A&E's new reality show Steven Seagal: Lawman, you were ecstatic. "Oh sweet," I said to myself, "Police officer Steven Seagal, snapping necks first and asking questions never." But, upon tuning in to the highly anticipated season 2 premiere, I was left wanting. He doesn't actually do anything.
Film Review: A Collection
Animal Crackers (1930)
The Marx Brothers
4/5 stars
Oh, those silly Marx Brothers... or as Kady would call them, the Groucho Brothers.
The Groucho Brothers are silly, quick, and witty -- some of the most important things I look for in both a comedian and a friend. Silliness is abound in this movie, which I believe was made in the late 1890s, and the large majority of the jokes work some 200 years after it's release -- a testament to the Groucho Brothers' comedic talents.
The Marx Brothers
4/5 stars
Oh, those silly Marx Brothers... or as Kady would call them, the Groucho Brothers.
The Groucho Brothers are silly, quick, and witty -- some of the most important things I look for in both a comedian and a friend. Silliness is abound in this movie, which I believe was made in the late 1890s, and the large majority of the jokes work some 200 years after it's release -- a testament to the Groucho Brothers' comedic talents.
Dear President of Lincoln Park Athletic Club
Dear President of Lincoln Park Athletic Club,
I regret to inform you that I will have to cancel my membership with your establishment. I was told that instead of simply phoning you, that I must in fact send a letter and my membership will be canceled within 45 days of your receiving it. You’re probably asking yourself, “Why does this man seem so disgruntled? Don’t I own one of the best gyms in the midwest?” No. You don’t. For several reasons, all of which will be explained by your personal assistant Andre, who is reading this letter aloud to you right now. The list is as follows:
I regret to inform you that I will have to cancel my membership with your establishment. I was told that instead of simply phoning you, that I must in fact send a letter and my membership will be canceled within 45 days of your receiving it. You’re probably asking yourself, “Why does this man seem so disgruntled? Don’t I own one of the best gyms in the midwest?” No. You don’t. For several reasons, all of which will be explained by your personal assistant Andre, who is reading this letter aloud to you right now. The list is as follows:
Red Lobster Halts Delivery Service During Endless Shrimp Fest
ORLANDO, FL-- After a considerable dip in company stock, suits at Red Lobster headquarters have decided to discontinue their short-lived delivery service. “We took a chance” says Clarence Otis Jr, CEO of the Darden Restaurant chain, “and it didn’t pay off. In fact, it did the opposite.” Many speculate as to why a company held in such high regard would think this to be a money maker. Otis went on to say, “It seems our marketing department got the math wrong on this.” At an emergency shareholder’s meeting, the thought-to-be revenue increasing equation was released:
Film Review: Dunston Checks In (1996)
In the midst of World War II, deep in the heart of the Cradle of Civilization, there lied an ancient relic, hunted by many but guarded by few. Acting on information obtained from an interrogation, a secret group of Allied soldiers had searched for weeks through hallowed halls of historic pasts, in a race against the greatest evil the world had ever seen. The antiquated object was sought by the Allied forces, if not for themselves, then to keep the relic's storied power from reaching the hands of the anti-Christ incarnate, the leader of the evil Axis powers. What the opposing powers were after was said to the ultimate power, created by the Lord on High, in the Earth's earliest days, and then kept hidden from mankind... until now.
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